And then you're a nearly-dead lobster.
Tonight, I saw a woman goal umpire while watching the football. It was like seeing a unicorn.
I pointed at the screen, pointed at the breasts and I said, "That's a woman! Was that a woman?!" I've watched football my entire life. Seeing a woman on that field, even just as an umpire?
I can't tell you what that meant to me. I can't tell you the joy and delight in my chest. It was BETTER than a unicorn! More liberating, more exciting, more invigorating. I have a new hero! I want to know who she is!
And I realised - I really need to see woman's football. But they don't televise that, sadly. Except on cable, and I can't afford it. :(
But really - seeing that woman throw the 'goal' signal made my entire night. I didn't realise how much it meant to me to have a woman on the oval as something OTHER than a cheerleader until I saw it. Then I realised that all these years, I'd been shouldering a sadness, a feeling of non-inclusion that I'd grown numb to.
(x-posted to my LJ).